28th or 29th???

***Before I start this post, I want everyone to remember I am in New Zealand and this will be from my point as I live here. LOL sorry but this could get rather confusing!***

My birthday is on the 28th of January. That is a fact. It's also a fact that I was born in Illinois on the 28th of January. Now I am mentioning this because my mother finds it necessary to call me every year for my birthday when it is the 29th here! And do you all know why??? Because I wasn't born in New Zealand, I was born in the States. Therefore, when it's the 28th there it's the 29th here and since I wasn't born in New Zealand she calls to wish me a happy birthday when it's the 28th there. Ok, why??? It's not like I changed my birthday when I came here nor do I celebrate it on the 29th because that would be when it's the 28th in the States. This really pisses me off. My birthday is the same no matter where I live, that doesn't change. For some reason she also thinks that Lauryn's birthday would no longer be on Veteran's Day in the States if we were to move back. Um, why??? Her birthday remains on the 11th no matter where we are. It's not like if we were in the States we would celebrate her birthday on the 10th. Really what is the rationale??? Honestly, does anyone see the point here besides her pissing me off about the whole thing? Why not just call your daughter when you know she will be celebrating her birthday instead of pissing her off the day after her birthday. I'm over it. So this year she will get a call for her birthday on the 13th here because afterall her birthday is on the 13th but who cares if it will be the 12th there!

PS: I asked if she got me something for my birthday and she said 'the same thing you got me' and I said 'which was what' and she said 'nothing'. Tit for tat! She is my mother, even if I don't get something for her shouldn't she want to get something for her daughter??? If I rightly remember she doesn't have but maybe a couple of people to buy for. I didn't know giving meant you have to give something to get something. Besides I didn't ask for a million dollars, in fact I didn't ask for anything nor do I ever but a decent acknowledgement would have been nice.

I Feel Loved

Even though my kids really, really, REALLY get on my nerves sometimes or bother me, I know I am their mommy. Hot off the heels of Hannah's post (The price of Children), I do feel my children are priceless. And each day I *try* to tell myself to enjoy them as much as possible today. I do realize that I am their mommy. No matter what happens in the world, I am their safe place to fall. I am the one they look to for comfort. Even though my kids have routines and rules to follow that doesn't make me any less of their mom nor does it make me a bad mom. My girls at least have some structure.

All of this hit home the other day after I had yelled at Lauryn for pulling things out of the trash. I had a hell day, yes it was one of them! The trash was full (Hugh never thinks to take the trash out, let's just keep piling it in!) and I had the lid off to take it out. I got sidetracked doing the dishes. Next thing I know Lauryn is pull something out of the trash. I tell her no and she moves her hand. As soon as I turn around she pulls it out again. So I go over to her and grab her little arm and say 'no'. She gets upset and starts screaming (by the way she is screaming you would have thought I beat her blue lol and it doesn't help that she soooooooo does not like being told off!). I go back to doing dishes letting her scream thinking she will finally go away and go in the other room. ***And folks this is where my hearts breaks*** As I'm doing the dishes, I feel this pull at my leg and look down and there she is standing at my feet trying to wedge herself between me and the cabinets. I look at her (in that look of 'what now?')and she is crying (real tears too) and she is standing there with her arms up for me to pick her up. And that is when it hit me. Why is it that even though I am the one that is mean to her, she will seek me out to comfort her??? That's where I know I am not a bad mom. If I was then she wouldn't have even bothered coming back to me as she does have her comfort things. But she wanted me and needed me to comfort her even though she knew I was upset with her. And that's priceless.

Kamryn often says to me 'mommy, aren't you happy?' this is usually what she asks when I am upset or yelling or crying lol. I never know how to answer. We can't always be happy with our day/life and so it comes out in other forms when we aren't 'happy'. I think every time I'm not 'happy' she thinks it's because of her or wants to know if it's because of her. Or she will come and give me a hug and say she needs a kiss. One night after getting off the phone with Hugh (he was WAY late getting home and I was worried and couldn't reach him), I just burst. She gets out of bed cause she hears me and comes over to me and says 'mommy, it's ok, is daddy being mad at you?' Then she gives me hugs and says 'it's ok, baby'. And again this is where I know I have to be doing something right and yes these moments are the priceless ones. I am their mommy forever and while I may not be as important when they are older, I am their world right now.

I Met the Tooth Fairy

We made an appointment to take Kamryn to the doctor on Wednesday so we could be reassured that she is getting better and that it was safe to take her back to day care. So this is what progressd yesterday:

Me: 'Kamryn, we need to take you to the doctor today.'
K: 'I get to see Graeme today?'
Me: 'No, the other doctor that looked at your mouth.'
K: 'Ohhhhh, I get to see the tooth fairy?' (she asked with this hint of excitement in her voice)

LOL, ok, right here, I died laughing!!!!!! I couldn't help it. How funny and cute is that? She thinks her new doctor is the tooth fairy!

At the doctors office we go in to see Dr. Hall. He has a look at her mouth and says she is well enough to join the world again and is no longer infectious. WONDERFUL! After the check she whispers to me 'Mommy, can I ask the tooth fairy for a treat for me being a good girl?'. He didn't hear what she said so I told him what she said. Then explained that she thinks he is the tooth fairy. He just kinda smirked (not sure how much a man likes being referred to as a fairy). When we left she said she liked the tooth fairy and it was ok for him to be her new doctor lol. Love it!

Three Things

Just following Hannah's blog since I was tagged!

Three names I go by:
1. Christi
2. Baby
3. Mommy

Three screen names I've had:
1. nzmommy
2. k&lsmommy
3. highim21too

Three physical things I like about myself:
1. My nose; it's small
2. My ears; they too are small
3. My skin.

Three physical things I don't like about myself:
(too many to list, can't cover it in 3 answers!)
1. My weight; too much
2. My butt; I have flat butt lol.
3. My hair; never know what to do with it!

Three parts of my heritage:
1. German
2. Irish
3. American Indian

Three things I am wearing right now:
1. Old Navy jeans
2. Blue and white stripe t-shirt
3. Bra

Three favorite bands/musical artists:
(This is a tough one for me too, often changes when I hear a good song on the radio lol!)
1. James Blunt
2. Nickelback
3. Kelly Clarkson

Three things I want in a relationship:
1. Love
2. Trust
3. HELP!

Two truths and a lie:
1. I watch American Chopper.
2. I'm trying to get pregnant with baby #3.
3. I didn't drive for 2 years after moving here.

Three physical things about the opposite sex that appeal to you:
1. Butt
2. Height - only tall men please!
3. Facial hair

Three favorite hobbies:
1. Scrapbooking
2. Taking photos
3. Logic puzzles

Three things I want to do badly right now:
1. Sleep
2. Logic puzzles
3. Work on my scrapbooking

Three things that scare me:
1. Losing my kids and them living without a mother
2. That we will forever be in limbo about our lives
3. That I won't be able to have another baby

Three of my everyday essentials:
1. Computer
2. Food
3. Kids (sometimes I can do without but not for long!)

Three Careers you have considered or are considering:
1. Scrapbook shop owner
2. Design team for magazine or paper/embellishment company
3. Midwife

Three places you want to go on vacation:
1. USA
2. Germany
3. Australia

Three kids names you like:
(other than what names my girls' already have)
1. Hunter Ewan
2. Bailey/Kelsey
3. Heath
(ok so that is a few more than 3!)

Three things you want to do before you die:
1. Live to be 100!
2. Travel
3. Make a small fortune

Three ways I am stereotypically a boy:
1. I can assemble things that come in boxes and enjoy it!
2. I would rather mow grass then pick a chore in the house.
3. I love sex!

Three ways I am stereotypically a girl:
1. I love my complete role as mother and wife.
2. I take many things to heart and cry instantly over them.
3. I love my scrapbooking!

Three celeb crushes:
1. Steve Broad
2. Ewan McGregor; especially rugged
3. James Blunt

Three people I am tagging:
1. Rachel
2. Jamie
3. EVERYONE ELSE READING!

Gingivitis?!?!?

Kamryn has been sick since Saturday. She's been running a fever and not eating. On Sunday she complained of her teeth hurting and she couldn't eat. So I tried brushing them for her and she started bleeding. On Monday, we took her to the doctor and he said she had a virus. By this time she had broken out into a rash on her back and chest, her gums were quite swollen, she complained of pains in her arms, the fever was still there, and complained that her head hurt when I would fix her hair or take her shirt off. And she has never before complained of her teeth hurting. The doctor had a look and said it was a virus and she has some redness in the back of her throat. He told us to come back by Wednesday if she wasn't starting to improve.

Tuesday morning she wouldn't eat. I knew she was hungry as she would ask for something to eat and then not be able to eat it. So I was starting to get upset that she hadn't eaten since Saturday and we both thought maybe she had something in her gum that was hurting. Her gums were even more swollen now too. We took her to a dental nurse. She said her teeth were fine and there wasn't anything to be concerned about with them but her gums were definitely badly swollen. She hadn't seen gums so swollen before.

Back to the doctor we went. He had one look at her gums and how swollen they were and immediately said it was gingivitis - just an infection of the gums. So he gave us a script for oracort (mouth ulcer medicine) and antibiotic (just in case it was bacterial). She was in such pain by Tuesday night, I felt really bad for her. All she wanted to do was sleep. I had a look online and read up about gingivitis. It's an infection from plaque and tartar build up on the teeth but I didn't find anything to say it was common in kids. So I wasn't happy with a diagnosis of gingivitis. I also didn't feel in my heart or gut that that is what it was. Hugh's dad has leukemia and his mom has diabetes. And bleeding and swollen gums is a symptom of that on top of all the other ones she had. So I was really worried my doctor was being too lax about the whole thing.

On Wednesday we went to a different doctor at a different practice to get a second opinion. This doctor had a thorough look at Kamryn and then told us that she had herpes gingivostomatitis. He said she was probably over the peak of it and would hopefully be better by next week. But if the condition hadn't changed by Friday to bring her back. He also said this is the primary outbreak of it and anything further like this would be something different and then further tests would need to be done. So from now on she should only get the sores on her lips (and maybe not even that!) but never in her mouth again. The news of this whole thing upset me tremendously as I am sure I am the one who passed on the virus since I have it. A huge weight is lifted from me though. I am upset with my doctor for not even telling me that herpes could have been a remote possibility.

Kamryn is very sick with this and I do not wish this on any child ever or at all. I am always careful with mine and that is what is more upsetting about it. But Hugh reminds me that she could have gotten it from somewhere else as well as the incubation period is 7 days. She has been to day care too. It's still upsetting as she isn't eating, she's very pale looking, tired, lethargic and her mouth is killing her. I really hope Lauryn misses this one but if she doesn't we will be a bit better clued in.

*FYI: She's had a pot of yogurt and marshmellows today! And hasn't complained about her mouth hurting as much as she had. It seems to be getting better as the day progresses!*

Hi-5 in Auckland

The big day finally came! Kamryn was off to Hi-5 on Friday afternoon for their Space Magic tour! Hugh said he had really good seats and that Kamryn really enjoyed it. She pouted a bit and did dance. When I called Hugh on the way home she just had to talk to me and tell me that she saw Kelly, Chats and JupJup lol. Hugh also said she cried when they left the stage. What a sweetie!!! But no autographs :( I thought for sure they would go above and beyond for their young fans! Hugh did get some fabulous photos which were great considering you weren't allowed to use a flash. He didn't get any of Kamryn actually at the show so I took one when she got home minus the star ponies though. Hugh also bought $45 worth of souvenirs lol which I wasn't expecting. If they come next year then I think both Lauryn and Kamryn will be going. I know Kamryn will want to go for sure!

Pretty Baby

Only if the Warehouse thinks so! Only joking, I know my daughter is cute. No one has to confirm this for me, I've known for a long time ;) The Warehouse is having a baby photo competition. So when we got the phone call to take Lauryn, right away I imagined all the stress involved and wanted to say no. Then the lady mentioned that first place was $1000! Ok, what the heck, I'm in! For a $1000 I can manage a small amount of stress. However again there is a catch, there always is, isn't there? It was a $5 sitting fee and you have to buy a 5x7 or 4-wallets for $35 to enter. Ok, fine by me if they turn out great and I think we have a good chance of winning.

Well I had it all sorted on what I wanted her to wear and how to do her hair. I know you are all wondering what you do with a 14 month olds hair! I picked out the most gorgeous Pumpkin Patch halter dress with blue, green and pink dots (it was sitting in the closet waiting for this moment, I know it!) and also sorted out the hair clips and ponies. She was soooooooo cute and the picture of perfection and surely what the Warehouse was looking for! After 3 poses we were doing well. She wasn't overly smiling but she wasn't crying or trying to get down either. Well after 3 poses the lady suggested we put her in a fairy dress. Cool! I change her and get ready to put her wings on and she trips over the damn camera stand! Face first (she hasn't figured out that she needs to put out her hands to stop herself yet). And yep, there was blood. She busted her bottom lip. Photo shoot over. I doubt the Warehouse would have taken pity on her with a broken lip and I didn't want to be tempted with extra photos that I find hard to resist anyway. The lady said I could come back in a week to finish the session but I said no and had enough. So I'm crossing my fingers that one of those 3 will make the cut!

Build-a-Bear

Ok, this is going to bother me until I figure it out. So this post is to all those NZ buddies (which isn't many lol) of mine. Some time ago I was watching the Living channel and during a commercial there was something about making your own bear. It went so quickly I wasn't sure where it was. I'm almost certain it was on the South Island but I have looked and looked and can't come up with anything. Does anyone have any more info? Maybe Rachel can find it as she did have in-laws that lived down there and I know she knows where to find this stuff ;) No pressure, Rachel lol!

I Had a Dream

After reading Hannah's post about Ethan's story, I thought 'I think Kamryn must be a ways off of that kind of storytelling'. Then this morning she woke up and said:

Mommy, you know I had a dream. I was on a boat at Grandma and Pawpaw's. And I was all by myself. Mommy and Daddy and Grandma and Pawpaw weren't there. I was so lonely.

Then I thought, 'hmmm maybe she does have something'. As I sat down to write her 'dream', she started telling me another story:

You remember my maytoe (tomato)? It growed bigger and bigger and I can't lift her up. She was too big! (Then I laughed.) Why are you laughing, Mommy?

As she finished telling me, I realized then that this IS her storytelling. It may not be long and elaborate but it is her using her imagination and that's all I hope for. I'm sure the older she gets the more detailed they will become. I guess I never recognized it as storytelling as such because we hear it often and I probably just overlooked it. Most 'stories' she does talk about are real people and things, so that part of it is hardly ever made up. Now I think I will pay closer attention (not that I didn't before) but now I will recognize more.

Cow Addiction

I know the title sounds a bit weird but it's true. Lauryn has a cow addiction. Since the moment she started sleeping in the porta cot in our room I made sure she had 3-4 stuffed animals. Not sure why, maybe so she wasn't so lonely or so she could adjust to it better. However, she has become attached to a stuffed cow that was put in there. She LOVES this cow! Her name is officially Bessie but we just call it Cow. If she finds Cow outside of the porta cot you would think she found gold or something! At a friends house for dinner, she would drop Cow and then go crawling quickly to it and then flop her head on it and then rub her face on it lol! Very funny to watch! She starts making funny noises too when she holds Cow. Cow is soooooooooo loved by Lauryn. Hugh often says 'Cow makes everything better' and now Kamryn says the same thing when Lauryn is giving Cow loves. Her two treasured items are Cow and Star blanket but I reckon Cow may win out in the end.

A week ago we exchanged gifts with Melissa after she had been gone to the States for nearly 5 months and she just happened to buy Lauryn a mini cow. And Lauryn went crazy over it! You would have thought her Cow actually had a baby. The funny thing about it is that Melissa didn't even know that she had a cow that she loved so much. If this is the only addiction I have to worry about in her little life then I am happy about it ;)

ETA: Found a photo of Lauryn with Cow but unfortunately it's from when she was 6 months old! Note to self: MUST GET A NEW ONE LOL!

New Pool

The girls got a new pool for Christmas. And since we live in a 'hilly' part of New Zealand, it's very difficult to have level ground. This pool needs level ground to work. It's one of them that is that is large at the bottom and smaller on top and the blow up ring around the top keeps it up. I'm not completely sure it should work but it does. The in-laws bought if for the girls and it's the best! Since we do not have level land out back, we decided to set it up in our garage since it is level lol. It's been great but the only problem is that the sun isn't heating it so it's been rather cold when we get in. The day we filled it up we did half cold and half hot and it was soooooooo nice! Kamryn loves it though. She's gone swimming every day since we set it up. Maybe one day we will live where there is flat land!

Christmas

Ok, I know it has come and gone but I haven't had much time to post. I'm glad it is past and really looked forward to Christmas this year. The girls got sooooooooo much. It took Kamryn 2 hours to open gifts. And we had to stop in the middle so I could put the turkey in the oven and put Lauryn down for a nap. Then we had a point where Kamryn had to go to her room to calm down as she was getting WAY too excited and was acting like a baby and thought everything under the tree should be hers. There were way too many gifts and next Christmas will be limited to like 7-8 each or something of that nature. It's not the money for us but more of how much we actually get them. As it was, Kamryn seemed to enjoy Lauryn's gifts the most. She thought the quad was only for Lauryn and was rather restrained in not sitting on it. But when I told her it was for both she was all over it then! It was a good day though. We had a nice lunch and just relaxed the entire day. It was good considering I had to go to work on Boxing Day! Enjoy the photos!