Saturday, July 01, 2006

Motherhood Over!

I was really hoping today could be different. Waking with little sleep and a headache, it started all wrong. I've decided I can not handle motherhood. I'm not cut out for this. There were times I thought I was but really I'm not. I just need to stop fooling myself. Already by 10:30 this morning Lauryn has a bloody fat lip and her gums are bleeding. Nice! All because Kamryn thought it necessary to head butt her for who knows what!!! I give up. This is ridiculous! And I am thoroughly upset with everyone that has more than one child who didn't say having two sucks!!!! Cause it really does!!! I feel like my girls belong to two different households cause they sure as hell can't exist in one! It would be better if my husband could actually get a clue. Obviously he can't. Even when I am yelling to finally get him motivated enough to do something, he can only manage that one task and that is it. And I love the days where he says he knows what it's like watching the kids. Yeah right! No you don't. Spend 5 days a week with them for 24 hours a day and then you can maybe say you understand. Honestly, he may as well just move on out cause half the time he puts just as much stress on me as the kids do and then I wouldn't have to worry about one of them pissing him off or getting on his last nerve which seems to be every nerve!

PS: I come home for work and Kamryn has taken a good piece of scrapbooking paper and covered it with some stickers I wanted to use and other bits. Leaving my desk in a state worse than it usually is. Ok, now how is it that Kamryn is in my scrapbooking room doing this without Hugh knowing? Ah well, let me enlighten you! He is on the computer with his back to her while she is having a nice ole play. And he didn't think to see what she was up to? No cause there is no respect for my things. Next time I come home and it has happened, I told him I will be burning one of his books at my discretion. Also we both go to bed at midnight cause he was finishing watching a movie. No sooner than my head hits the bed, Lauryn starts crying. Guess who has to go and take care of her? Yep, me. And his excuse 'I have to be at work at 6 you can do it'. Nice! You shouldn't have stayed up watching a movie until bloody midnight then!


Blogger Hannah said...

OH BABE!!!! This sucks!!! You need a break. I need to smack someone's head against a brick wall (and no, it ain't yours). Like I said last night, you are being taken forgranted and it has to stop!!!


PS. I've got a fireplace. Wanna burn some books?

2:49 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

(((HUGS))) Big time.

I understand where you are coming from 100%. There are lots and lots of times that I've laid on the bed and CRIED because someone thought that I would make a good mommy. Who the hell were they kidding????

My husband can be the same way too...the horrible thing is that men CAN only do 1 think a time. It's in their biology. I try to remember that when I get pissed at mine for not being able to do as much as me. But it's also important that he KNOWS he can only do one thing so while he's watching the kids...that's what he does!!!!!!

5:34 PM  
Blogger Michelle said...

All men are the same! It's nothing personal. You're a great mom, tomorrow will be a better day. How do I know? I've been there, am still there most days but since Aidan is sleeping better life is better. Tell Hugh to suck it up and take the girls out for a few hours.


10:24 PM  
Blogger Heidi said...

When I read your post it totally said the things I am feeling at this very moment. I just got home from a 12hr shift to three loads of dirty laundry waiting nicely in piles, unfolded laundry in a basket, the list goes on. I stormed around doing housework hoping to make a point, but men, they just don't get it. Not to mention, complaints that there are no groceries. Hope you have a better day tomorrow. You mentioned before that you couldn't read my blog and I have heard from others on firefox that they also have trouble. Seems to be better with outlook explorer.

4:10 PM  

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