Saturday, July 02, 2005

Stranger Danger

It's always nice to see my daughter cry when someone that isn't her mommy picks her up or when she can't see me. Ok, maybe that came out wrong. What I mean is it really makes me feel like we have a bond, not that I like seeing her upset. At Plunket the other day, the nurse wanted to check how Lauryn was baring weight on her legs. Lauryn eye-balled her for a good 5 minutes and then she stood her up. Of course with her back to me and in that instance she started to cry. This is huge for me as Kamryn was not like this. Many people could take her and she wouldn't bat an eye. Lauryn is definitely a mommy's girl and it shows. Sometimes Hugh gets the same reaction.

The road to get here has been a long one. Kamryn and I never had this instant bond that Lauryn and I share. It heartens me to even say that as her mother but it's true. I blame much of it on my thyroid disease and it's just a shame I don't get any of that time back. I am a true protector of Lauryn and sometimes maybe too much. Maybe Kamryn picks up on this. Some days I feel as if I have lost a connection with Kamryn. Sometimes I am at a loss as to how to react to her or how to be involved with her. She is at a very funny age and maybe that is why I grab on to Lauryn with so much - for fear of missing out again. I do feel bad that Kamryn is the oldest as she has to go through everything first. Whereas Lauryn will have the road paved. Lately I find myself questioning my parenting skills. I have never questioned them in the past but now I am. Mostly because I do not know how to deal with Kamryn. I am hoping we can get there and I want my connection back. It's important to the both of us.


Blogger Rachel said...

Hi Christi
thanks for posting on my blog ; )
Luckily I have a close and equal bond with both of my boys, and I try really hard not to give one more attention than the other. Maybe it's not really luck, as both boys are smiley, easy-going, and great with other people, too. I think this has something to do with their personalities, but also something to do with them going to Playcentre. Because our Playcentre has a low adult to child ratio, and a mix of kids (from babies to 5 year olds), I reckon that kids do really well at the 'socialisation' thing, because they get to know other kids (who become baby or big brother and sister role-models) AND adults, too. Going to Playcentre helps me, too, become more involved with Luke and his playing, and Daniel gets to spend time with me and the others there, heightening his feeling of belonging. I guess, for me, Playcentre is like an extension of my family. It has been a life-saver, and has helped my parenting skills. I'm sure I would have had the TV on more often as a babysitter if I hadn't been going there. Maybe you need something like that for Kamryn? Try not to let the parent commitment and training freak you out! Going to something like Playcentre with Kamryn will strengthen your bond with each other, I'm certain of that.
To find out more about Playcentre, you can go to
Playcentre's website
I've done a search and there is a Playcentre on 41a Stanmore Bay Road
Phone: 09 424 1090
Fax: 09 424 1090
Sessions: Mon, Tues, Thurs, Fri 9.15am- 11.45am
Wed. 9.15 - 11.45 am

On the Playcentre website it says about Whangapararoa Playcentre:
Kia Ora,
Welcome to Whangaparaoa Playcentre, we are situated just minutes away from beaches and the Plaza and the bus stops right out the front.
You can smell the sea air and glimpse the ocean from our picturesque, spacious backyard.

We are a family run co-operative that has been active now for 30 years plus. We proudly follow the Playcentre philosophy and are committed to involving parents / whãnau in our children’s early childhood education.

"Whangaparaoa Playcentre aims to provide an environment that is safe, fun and stimulating for all the children with 16 curriculum areas to play in at all sessions. Where parents can meet other adults and enjoy interacting with other children. At times we get involved in community activities and other times we have organised trips that are educational as well as lots of fun for children and adults alike.

I checked out Ngaio Playcentre 3 times as a visitor before enrolling - I reckon that it's a good thing to do. Hope this helps!

PS: I start work tomorrow. Tues - Friday 1pm - 5.30pm, and working this Saturday (but have this Sunday off). They're training me up, hence me working a lot this week!
We extend to you 3 free visits so that you can check out Playcentre. Please feel free to contact us for more information and to make a time to visit."

12:57 PM  

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